ENOUGH IS ENOUGH
If you are reading this post, I already know some things about you. You are a loving adult. You are a caring parent. You are dedicated to disciplining your child with discernment and educating your child with wisdom. You are trying hard. You research to find out things you don't know. You are doing the best you know how. You are doing as much as you can to raise responsible, dependable adults. You care about your child and your family. You want the world to be a better place.
And then, for these reasons and others, for the sake of your children's hearts and your own, you decide to homeschool. You are so excited to begin this journey together.
But life happens, and sometimes life is hard.
Children are ill. Someone needs surgery. A pet dies. Your child needs therapy or other services. A parent loses a job. Family members get sick. Your marriage crumbles. Elderly parents or grandparents require around-the-clock care. You have a house fire. Your child is diagnosed with a “disability.” Your pipes break. You struggle with health issues. Your addition takes six months longer to put up than estimated. A family member dies. Your teen has a season of introversion. You have to take time off to go hunting/finish a job/move across the country/take a vacation. You find it necessary to start a job. You have a baby or two (or three!)
Gradually, your initial excitement gives way to optimism and optimism gives way to overwhelm and overwhelm gives way to despair. Am I doing enough? you ask. We're so “behind.” I can't see any progress. Wouldn't my children be better served by a dedicated, trained classroom teacher?
Banish those thoughts!
Even now, during a period of extended down-time or reduced productivity caused by circumstances beyond your control, you are doing enough. You are loving your children well and providing the atmosphere they need to thrive. A season, a few seasons, of less rigorous expectations will not harm your children's education. Remember that their education (and yours) is an atmosphere, a discipline, a life. These things start at birth and continue through the trials and tribulations we may be experiencing, through the joys and triumphs we will surely experience, into our old age and beyond. Unplanned interruptions of all kinds, even losing oneself for a season, will not cause lasting damage to our family's education.
I like to think of education not as an inclined plane, steadily climbing at the same angle for thirteen years and then leveling off, but as a series of stairs, with leaps in knowledge and wisdom like the vertical riser on the front of each stair and the horizontal steps like the breaks we take, whether they be difficult, unexpected interruptions or restful pauses that we use to assimilate the knowledge and information we've taken in. Instead of becoming frustrated with the pauses, we can instead see these seasons of interruption as a blessing, a chance to unwind, regroup, refocus.
So the next time you have a season of interruption
and you start doubting your abilities to home educate your children or you wonder about your student's lack of measurable progress, put your foot down. Embrace the educational pauses. If whatever you're doing is all you can possibly do at this time, then what you are doing is enough. It has to be. Nothing more can be expected of you. Life happens, and sometimes circumstances are out of our control. Where there is no control, there is no responsibility.
Remind yourself, since you are your own severest critic, What I'm doing is enough. You might need to repeat this daily. Create a mantra in your head to use when you feel the spirit of criticism coming. It might be a prayer or a pep talk, a song or a soliloquy, but make sure to remind yourself that you are doing your best and you will continue to do so indefinitely. Because this season will eventually pass, and a season of productivity will follow, and your influence will continue to be felt by your children and your children's children.
Enough is enough.